Overcoming our Fears...

Overcoming our Fears…

I have had the fear of having a massage for ages. I always kept on saying to myself it would be one of my weight loss goal rewards. The weight loss just never seemed to be great enough to reward myself with one. My fear was fueled by insecurity. I hated to have somebody see my imperfect skin or the flab. What if I broke the table? I know it all seems silly and I even giggled at the table one myself as I wrote it but it seriously was how I felt. This journey of self discovery and becoming the best ME is all about trying new things, breaking down barriers, conquering my fears and overcoming my insecurities.

Last week I received a bbm from two dear friend’s asking what I was doing on such and such date. After a few questions, I realized what they were up to and I immediately freaked out. I freaked because for a few reasons. The main reason being there was no way this fattie was ready to go and receive a massage

I spoke with one of the gals on the phone and she was so calm, reassuring and just said she would not force me but if I just trusted her she was confident that it would be a pivotal moment on my journey. I promised her I would think about it and let her know by the next morning. It was really odd and I can’t really explain it but from that moment forward I never felt any nervousness, doubt or fear about the massage. I was in!

I am forever grateful for these two ladies, they helped me overcome a HUGE thing and to add to it they gave it to me as a gift. Just thinking about it, I have tears in my eyes. Their generosity is immeasurable, as well as their friendship. Thank you just doesn’t seem like enough. I can’t wait to meet both of them face to face and give them each a great big ol’ hug. Yeah, that is another thing – we haven’t ever met. We have communicated endlessly via bbm, phone, twitter, blogs, etc., however, never made that eye to eye connection. I have always felt blessed for the close friendships I had in my life. My friends are family to me. I never imagined I would experience my heart overflowing the way it is today. The new people that have come into my life in the last few months leave me speechless. The only thing that comes to mind that is remotely appropriate is to say that God is good!

I hope one day I am able to help somebody the way I was helped by my two angels. I want to pay it forward and help somebody get to their next level.

What is your fear and why?


just a little funny about my experience:

***Because in true ME fashion - I have to share this. I didn’t really know what to expect so I showered that morning, put some comfy clothes on and was off. When I arrived the massage therapist explained to me what he was going to do be doing, etc. He showed me the table and how it worked. The only thing I focused in on was the white terry cloth covered head read that my face was going when I was on my stomach. My next thought was, “Oh shit, you dumbass – you have make up on”. Thank goodness I was able to use the restroom before we began I was in the bathroom with the handsoap washing my face so that I didn’t get makeup all over his white headrest.

My lesson learned for the next massage (yep, I said it – I’m going back) no earrings, and no make-up – the verdict is out on the ponytail!